I would like to think that I work really hard at whatever I do. I tend to pour myself into whatever I’m doing, especially if it’s my responsibility. I, also, tend to always think things are going to work out for the best, that people are going to do the right thing, and that you will be rewarded for going above and beyond your responsibilities. I guess, I’m just naive that way.
Today was terrible for me because I realized that although I’ve poured myself into a job for the past three years, learning whatever needed to be done, and doing whatever I needed, that the world is not fair. It’s not supposed to be, I know that… Man messed it up a long time ago and it will only get worse. If the world was fair, we wouldn’t long for something more. I know that whatever doesn’t kill me will make me stronger… right? But sometimes, I just can’t see it.
I’m struggling right now to continue in this situation because I don’t want to be where I am not appreciated. Not that there aren’t people there that do appreciate me, but it’s hard when the only recognition you get is an occasional pat on the back. I don’t particularly want someone to gush over how well I do something, but I would like to see the effort I have put in to help things run smoothly be rewarded. When a company says that they like to promote from within and then hire from the outside, what does that say? I’m sure there’s more going on than what I see; I just feel like there is no where else for me to go there… I’m at a dead end. I don’t like dead ends. I want to be able to continue to learn and move forward. I just don’t know if I will have that opportunity ever where I am. I’m definitely praying for God’s will in my life and that He would make things clear for me.