Living in Expectation

So I’m Supposed to Be at Small Group

chinchillas07 — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 23:22:34 +0000

So I’m supposed to be at my small group right now, but I have this cold thing going on. My head hurts, but my kids are up running around and who can sleep with that going on?? Anyway, I listened to a sermon last night from Matt Chandler and it was really good. He talked about how we like to think that God is for us, that he created the world because he was lonely and we are so awesome… Of course, we normally qualify that in some respect, but the truth is that God isn’t all about us. God isn’t for us. God is for God. And everything we do should be to glorify him.

“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” 1 Cor 10:31

Chandler made another great comment though that I want to take with me wherever I go and he said something like this:

The less my life is about me, the freer I am.

I really liked that. I’ve thought something similar to that before. The less my life is about me and the more it’s about the Gospel, the freer I am. I don’t have to worry so much. I don’t have do so much. I can just relax in Jesus.

Anyway, I just thought it was a really good message. Now, do you think I can get my kids to go to bed? It’s almost 6:30?

Creative Outlet

chinchillas07 — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 04:18:08 +0000

So, I’ve been kind of depressed about certain situations never seeming to work out to what I feel is my benefit… (I know, please don’t remind me that God has me where I am for a reason!) Anyway, I decided about two weeks ago that I was going to write a story. I’m a creative person and honestly, I create characters and stories in my head all the time to pass the time or to help me go to sleep, but I’ve never written anything down. That’s probably weird, right?

Anyway, I’ve spent the last few weeks writing in my spare time (and sometimes, in the time I should be sleeping…) and I’ve finally finished the ending. I still feel like I have some things to fill in and develop more, but the bulk of the story is written. It’s a gives me a great sense of accomplishment and being able to have a creative outlet has been like balm to my soul!!

Anyway, my story is really a novel… ha! I have written roughly 78,000 words, which according to the average word per page count in a novel would be 312 pages! Woo Hoo! Who would have thought it would only take a few weeks to write 78,000 words? I’ll probably never do anything with it… It’s somewhat frightening to think of someone reading something like that… What if it’s terrible?! It would be very personal to me… probably because I’m a task-oriented person, so once I’ve perfected my task, it should be… well, perfect!

Anyway, I enjoy writing, so maybe it will get me back in the habit! I know of only one person who looks forward to my posts and reminds me I haven’t posted in a while . Anyway, I guess my unspoken New Year’s resolution was to write a novel.

Protected: Love and Fear

chinchillas07 — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 18:52:41 +0000

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Gospel

chinchillas07 — Fri, 26 Aug 2011 01:23:07 +0000

So I’ve been thinking a lot about the Gospel lately… my mindset is changing… or maybe I should say Jesus is changing the way I think. I don’t know if I can explain it except to say I think I’ve put the Gospel message in a backseat in my life. I’ve used it as an insurance policy and not as a manual on how to live, so I’m trying to live in light of the Gospel. I’m still working out what that means exactly, but the power of the Gospel is freeing. I feel so much freer… and that may seem vague, but I’m still working it out as to what all that means.

In the meantime, I read Philippians today and here’s a few things I thought about…

In light of the Gospel, Philippians tells me to be content …. Not to be comfortable, but in whatever circumstances I am in, know that Christ has suffered first and more than I ever could, and so I can be content in my current place. If I’m poor, know that Jesus gave up everything, emptied himself, to come to this earth as a man and pay the price for my sin. If I’m suffering, know that Jesus suffered in my place more than I will ever suffer. He willingly gave up his place beside God the Father to come to this earth, to feel what it was to be mortal, to be in a place covered with sin and death, to give up his life in a brutal, vicious death at the hands of people who should have recognized who he was.

In light of the Gospel, Philippians tells me to be thankful. He has provided more than I need. If I lost every worldly possession I have, if I lost my family, if I lost my health, if I lost it all, I should still praise my Jesus because of his immeasurable blessings He has poured out on me. Jesus came to this earth, humbly, and gave up his life for me, a sinner. I could have drowned in my sinfulness, in my self-righteousness, but he lifted me out by the grace he displayed. He gave me his righteousness. Everything I am, I owe to him. I will be thankful to him for all that he has given me. He gave it to me before I even asked.

In light of the gospel, Philippians tells me to abound in love. This works itself out in a couple ways. First, I need to be aware of needs of those around me… and able to give to those in need. Jesus was always aware of the needs of those around him… more acutely aware of them they the people in need even were. Sometimes, the need is a strong word to help them realize the futility of their thoughts. Second, I need to live a life that shows Jesus’ love, his abounding love as evidenced in the Gospel. In Phil 2:5-11, it tells us about the kind of love Jesus showed us… he put us above himself, he gave his life for us, he served us, he met our needs physically and spiritually. We need to show this Gospel love in our lives for others around us.

Out of Context

chinchillas07 — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 00:56:17 +0000

Okay, so I made a statement the other day (which I’m pretty sure came from God!) that I really find profound and it’s something like this: Too often, the Church takes the Gospel out of context. So what do I mean? We want to talk about Jesus and his grace, but we neglect to talk about the background of his grace. We neglect the Old Testament. I mean, think about it… how often do you hear pastor speak from an Old Testament passage…. not just add it into what they are talking about, but really, truly going through an OT passage.

I love the Old Testament. I love the stories. But more than that, I love how it points to Jesus. I just don’t think you can even begin to understand what Jesus did on the cross until you begin to understand the Old Testament. Take the story of Passover… The people of Israel were enslaved to the Egyptians. God, through a series of plagues, was working towards their freedom. So He tells Moses that there is going to be one last plaque and it’s the worst. God will kill the firstborn sons. The Israelites are to take a lamb and kill it and put its blood on their doorposts. Then, when the Destroyer comes, if he sees the blood on the doorposts, he will “pass over” that house and any firstborn son within will be saved. In the same way, Jesus, the perfect, unblemished lamb, spilt his blood on the cross. If we will take that blood and cover the doorposts of our hearts with it, then when the Destroyer comes, he will be forced to “pass over” us. I don’t know… that just makes me full of joy, that God would save me. He’s awesome. And the grace of Jesus means so much more when I can see it in light of thousands of years of the history found in the Old Testament. When God wrote the OT (through human hands), he had Jesus in view… everything points to Him; it gives Jesus’ life, death and resurrection so much more meaning.

Another Birthday

chinchillas07 — Tue, 19 Jul 2011 21:35:41 +0000

So, today is my birthday… another year has come and gone and a lot has happened and is happening!

We celebrated our ten year anniversay in May. I can’t believe we’ve been married that long. In some ways, it seems like a long time ago and in some ways, it’s seems like it’s only been days! I am so proud of Frankie and all he has accomplished. He knows what he wants and he’s working towards that. We have put our house up on the market and are looking forward to it selling so we can move out of state. It’s a big trip, but we know, we ar edoing God’s will and that’s what is important.

The girls are getting so big. Alyx is the smartest 4-year old I know. She can tell you about Jesus; she remembers everything, and she asks a ton of questions. She is still stubborn, but she’s a softy at heart. She’s always happy and she’s a great big sister. She loves Taylor so much. Taylor is my little butterball… she eats anything you put in front of her. She’s a happy girl, too. She loves Alyx and they play really well together. She is going to be a bigger handful than we ever thought Alyx would be though!! She tests the limits all the time. But she’s a sweet baby. They both love to dance around. And the both can sing along with Spongebob Squarepants!

Spiritually, I would say I’ve grown a lot, too. Some of my beliefs have become more defined and some have just come alive! We attended an assessment with the Acts 29 Network in May and it was absolutely life-changing to me. I just really realized who I am in Christ and that just affects every part of my life. I’m trying to remember daily who I am and who God is. It’s awesome to realize I am so unworthy and will never EVER do anything worthy of his love, but he loves me anyway… in spite of it. Awesome.

I am so thankful for all the people that have impacted my life, people that have changed me, people that love me and care for me despite of how I suck at relationships . I am thankful to God for all he has done for me. I am thankful for my husband who loves me even when I mess up and I am thankful for my children… they bless me in so many ways. I am thankful to my family and friends who have supported us over the past years in our decisions to follow Jesus. I only hope that I can be an encouragement to those around me as they have been to me.

Song of Praise

chinchillas07 — Tue, 19 Jul 2011 02:24:00 +0000

So, I’ve been trying to memorize some verses, and I’m doing okay, but there’s a bunch of them!

Luke 2:46-55 And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked upon the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on, all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name. And his mercy is for those who fear him from generation to generation. he has shown great strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts; he has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate; he has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent awat empty. He has helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, as he spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his offspring forever.”

Whew! I told you it was long! But I love these verses for several reasons. I heard Mark Driscoll speaking on these verses and he talked about how much Mary had to complain about. She would lose a lot by becoming the mother of the Lord Jesus. But she chose to praise God instead. This is something I wish to continually keep in the forefront of my mind… I tend to complain a lot, but i don’t want to… I want to praise my Jesus for all that he has done, for all that he will do.

Right now, I’m feeling a little down in several areas of my life, but I know that Jesus will take care of it. It may not be to my liking, and it may not be until later that people would call me “blessed,” but I need to trust him above all else. (Did you notice that she said “all generations will call me blessed?” It wasn’t those people around her that would call her blessed; they would call her several names, but blessed wasn’t one of them….) I will never be worthy enough to deserve Jesus’ love or to be used by him, but he chose me anyway… that makes me love him more. I wish to praise him all the more because he chose me, a sinner.

Missing Me?

chinchillas07 — Fri, 15 Jul 2011 01:11:59 +0000

So, to be honest, I really haven’t thought much about writng on my blog, but a good friend said she wished I start back, so I thought I’d at least try to !

I’ve wanted to write, but everything I want to write about are things I really don’t want to share with the world.

So, let’s just go with what God’s teaching me right now… patience among other things! We now officially have our house on the market, but I feel like I’m in transition. I’m still living a life that is somewhat past me already… if that makes sense. We know we’re moving, but it depends on the house selling. But I can’t wait! I’m excited! I know, it’s going to be tough getting things started, but I’m really looking forward to it. In the meantime though, I feel stuck.

We, also, had to make a really hard decision this week. I mean, it was probably a long time coming, but it was hard anyway. It’s sad to see a relationship die, something you’ve put time and effort into, and it’s even harder when the other person(s) involved don’t see to care much about it. I guess, that just goes to show that it wasn’t as important as you thought it was. I’m disheartened by this. I’m, also, disheartened by the implications. I’m praying God will work to restore the situation.

Memorize

chinchillas07 — Sat, 05 Feb 2011 05:07:33 +0000

So, one of my goals for this year is to memorize some Scripture verses… I’m taking two verses a month. It’s not a lot, but I just figured that way I can focus on them a little bit. So, for January, my verses are:

James 2:14-17

What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but does not have deeds? Can such a faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes or daily food? If one of you says to him “Go, I wish you well. Keep warm and well fed!” But does not do anything about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if not accompanied by deeds, is dead.

Now, I was working on this one before January, but never put it completely to memory until this past month. I love these verses because it reminds me to put action behind my words. I can’t just say something, I have to do something.

My second verse is Phil 4:8.

Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think of such things.

I’ve needed that verse this week a lot. God always seems to use whatever verses I’m focusing on at that time. Coincidence? Yeah, right… I’m a little nervous about the verse I’ve chosen for February! At church, the last few weeks we’ve been talking about how life is unfair, so I chose a few of the verses we talked about. If you want to look them up, it’s Job 1:21 and 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. DOn’t ask me about those yet… I have the month of February to memorize them!

Got Excuses?

chinchillas07 — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 01:28:03 +0000

People use all kinds of things as excuses for why they don’t do something. Some of them are valid reasons. Some are just cop outs. It’s also amazing that Christ followers do the same thing. We look for a reason NOT to do what the Bible teaches. There is probably one major excuse that Christians give for not doing something. Do you know what it is? Are you ready? I’ll bet you’ve heard it or even used it yourself. Ready? “That’s not my spiritual gift.”

Now, you might be fighting me on this one, but here’s why I think that’s just an excuse. Jesus never said that you shouldn’t serve if you didn’t have that gift. Matthew 10:45 says “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” So, if Jesus served, shouldn’t we? Jesus never said that you shouldn’t share the good news with those around you if you didn’t have the gift of evangelism. Acts 1:8 says “But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” We are his witnesses… not we may be his witnesses… we are.

I could go on… I’ve heard the same excuses over and over. I’ve even said them myself. I’m not a “people” person, but I have built relationships with people around me. God calls me to evangelize those around me… even if it’s out of my comfort zone.

I hate excuses. Sure, I have them… but I really hate having to give an excuse because ultimately, it means that for some reason (whether it be a valid reason or a cop out), I didn’t do what I was supposed to.